There is a place I know, but seldom go,
for the fear I have of being stung by snow.
Or perhaps out there, something looms much worse,
Red eagles, rabid beagles or a crazy old nurse.
So I prepare myself for when I venture outside,
click clack says the cupboard where my defences hide.
It’s made of dragon liver, it smells like egg yolk,
I fear nothing from beneath my voluminous cloak.
Hen’s teeth and cat’s wings, the blood from a stone,
The tonsils of Elvis and Joey Ramone.
Sea snakes and worm tears, some beans from a can,
All stitched together by a pig from Japan.
The Grackle could get me, The Jabberwocky too!
Lions and tigers and bears from Peru!
But look what I’ve got, do you think it’s a joke?
My loveliest, jubbliest, voluminous cloak.
A little too crass and a little too loud,
It scares them away like a fart in a crowd.
Werewolves it terrifies, vampires it revokes,
My voluptuous, virtuoso, voluminous cloak.